Fitting in vs being part of something bigger than myself and how it can help to redefine personal purpose

To belong, contribute and be supported in our interests in a nurturing environment, are core human needs that may be quite difficult to fulfil in the majority of the organizing structures through which we currently go on with our lives.
If we find ourselves in this situation, we are probably displaying some combination of the following 5 responses.
– I believe in this structure (company, family, association…) even if it’s not perfect it brings about order and stability, and I am committed to make the best that I can despite the fact that at times a part of me feels overwhelmed and wondering if this is all that life is about.
– I don’t feel in alignment with a lot of what’s going on with this structure but I don’t see any reachable alternative, so I do the bare minimum to not get in trouble an live one day at a time.
– I’m not satisfied with the structure and feel a sense of mission to bring about positive changes and transformation. Depending on whether it’s the right timing and if the appropriate developmental resources are available, I may find my own path and achieve some level of success or I may start to oscillate to some of the following responses.
– I create my own alternative structure that may become an integrated alternative or a more personal bubble to protect and incubate myself.
– Having experienced a combination of the previous responses, an inner and outer awareness develops that brings about a sense of what the larger system or structure needs and what I feel moved to contribute in relation to the perceived needs.
Whenever we are responding whiting a combination of the first 3 responses we find ourselves in a fitting in mindset and even if we are successful it probably means that someone in that system is not succeeding and is disengaging in some way.
The 4th response is an in between space that may or may not become integrated in larger living-systems. When it becomes more integrated we are acting with the awareness described in the 5th way of responding.

This reflection may help to gain more clarity on the subject of finding purpose without getting stuck in the fitting in mindset or in a self-centered mindset in which we pursue what matters to us without considering so much others and the environment as being part of the living-systems that we belong to.
Having as a reference the 5th response, we may say that when we are aware of our interests and the needs of the larger system, it’s possible to translate that awareness in a key role that is ours to fulfil in that system – if we want to, and the same applies to every other part of that living system.
Therefore, purpose is a role that we energize in a broader context and is ever changing and evolving. Potential is being made manifest and with every change that results, new opportunities to bring about more latent potential arise – as we and the systems evolve we energize different roles that are purposefully driven from in and out.

To know is to do…

  • If I think in terms of purpose what are the underlying beliefs that sustain my personal position?
  • When faced with different perspectives than mine, how do I acknowledge the tendency to hold on to what is familiar and remain open to expand my own box?
  • Am I willing to question the implicit agreements that maintain the status-quo and confront the fear of being ostracized and rejected? Do I rely on resources and a community to do so?
  • Am I open to get acquainted with alternative ways to collaborate? How do I intend to do it?
  • What are my tendencies in the dance between tradition and innovation?

“I am becoming Homo Veritas”   

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By |2021-10-21T21:00:38+01:00October 3rd, 2021|Psychology|0 Comments

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